Father Son Chats with a Child Who Isn’t Your Son

There are many things Bible College and personal study prepared me for…but nothing can prepare you for having “father-son talks” with a child who is not your son.

After reading  a Bible story about Sampson this morning a boy motioned to a girl walking by my house and said: “see her she’s pregnant!”  I asked why that was important and he (a 12-year-old) proudly told me he had slept with her.

Now the truth is he hadn’t done this, but at the age of twelve like most children on the island, he was sexually active.  

Sadly I’m used to talking with children who lost their virginity before teenage years and find my being a virgin at forty-one hilarious (definitely wrong by Biblical standards).

As we continued talking about the Biblical principle of sex within marriage I asked him a question.

  • Me:  so what happens if your girlfriend gets pregnant
  • Him:  That won’t happen
  • Me:  But let’s just say it does
  • Him:  I will leave the Country
Don’t rush by that…here is a 12-year-old boy who has already committed himself to sexual activity, and is also prepared to leave whenever his girlfriend gets pregnant (according to him he’s already set money aside to get himself to another Country)

You have to ask yourself “where did he get an idea like that?”

it’s simple really….

From his father

Now this young mans father happens to be in Barrouaille but I can tell you there are a large number of young mothers left by themselves with small children because the father either left the Country, or ran to another part of the island.

To put it bluntly, one generation of gutless cowards (refusing to take responsibility for actions) has raised up another generation of gutless cowards.

As I explained to him that manhood isn’t about strength (or how many women you’ve been with) but character and commitment it didn’t seem to make a difference but that’s okay.  I’m perfectly willing to have awkward father-son chats if that’s what it takes for the Gospel to shine through.